This is my 2013 Mother’s Day experience. I hope all Moms felt some extra love today. I spent time with my Mother and my sister, Julie, at her Mother in law‘s home, Patsy. I feasted on tomato pie, squash casserole, baked potato and okra made in a way I’ve never seen but it was absolutely scrumptious. Then I topped it off with her delicious banana pudding. I’m slipping bites of the pudding in as I’m writing this. It was all delicious and I stuffed myself to point of my maternity pants stretching to the limits. No I’m not pregnant. I wear maternity pants often because of the abdominal muscle loss causing my stomach to be huge. Yes I understand I’m also fat, But my stomach is still way out of proportion fat compared to the rest of me and I can’t suck it in. I’m very thankful for maternity clothes. Anybody else out there dealing with abdominal muscle loss causing the past due pregnancy look, try maternity clothes. Nobody can tell and they come in the same styles of regular clothes.
Patsy has been part of my life since my early teens, when Julie first started dating her son, Kevin. So she feels more like an aunt really. She gave me a great and unexpected gift today. She reads my blog and read about my bird watching and how I see them and can’t identify them. She bought me a really nice book, BIRD SONGS, with 250 North American Birds. It has audio to the side of the book. You can find the bird by number and it plays the sound that specific bird makes. It’s really nice. There are lots of trees behind my backyard fence and I hear all kinds of birds, I’m going to be proud identifying one by sound, then spotting it. She was also thoughtful and aware enough of my needs to buy a book stand for it since it would be difficult to hold and search the book while handling the binoculars. I can have it right beside me on my bedside table to go through while looking out.
Patsy and her husband Jerry have created a beautiful back yard. They have built an enclosed sunroom with full windows to see and hear everything. They built a nice koi pond. The sound of water is my favorite and sitting in there, especially on a nice day like today with the windows open is so nice and relaxing with the water fall sound from the koi pond and all the birds. It’s where we always eat. If it was my house I would spend my time in that room. Patsy and Jerry can rattle off anything about bird species. I was shown a mocking-bird today. I didn’t even know we have mocking birds around here. I learned there is a lot more I don’t know than I originally thought. I’ve always known their back yard is beautiful, but I also learned today it is a certified bird sanctuary. It’s very impressive. It’s embarrassing in a way for me. I can’t even identify most of the vegetables growing or the beautiful flowers.
In steps ALS. While talking I started feeling the beginnings of a dull ache/cramp in my right leg. I tried ignoring it at first. Sometimes it goes away on its own. It didn’t, I couldn’t get it comfortable and within a few minutes the top of my leg was in a full tight cramp. Of course this is the time I leave home without anything to take for it. Julie had some ibuprofen. I planned to go visit with my daughter, Amanda, after leaving Patsy’s so I let Tony know we needed to start getting ready to go. Amanda always comes here so I wanted to go spend time at her house for a change while I was actually out. It was time to go anyway after eating and conversation. My leg was getting worse so I knew we needed to leave. Patsy gave me a bowl of pudding and put my book and the stand in a bag. Tony, Kevin and my nephew Andrew carried me in my chair down the porch stairs. They make no big deal out of it. They also greeted me at the car door when we pulled up like carrying a person in a wheelchair up the stairs is an everyday thing. I’m so thankful. I’m just always so scared someone will injure their back doing it. I would feel horrible.
My leg was still in a full painful cramp. The intense pain that you can’t play off and pretend it’s not happening. I still wanted to go to Amanda’s. It was important to me. She has two or three stairs to go up her porch and into the house. I asked her to come out to the car. She brought Brayden out for me to see and Jamieson was riding his bike on the sidewalk with a friend. Her Mother in law, Donna, came out to say hello and hoped I came in. I appreciate her a lot for being there for Amanda while I’m dealing with this, this, this Damn ALS. Amanda’s husband, Jason, came out to wish me Happy Mother’s Day and assured me we could get me inside. I was just hurting too bad at this point. I hate you ALS. I hate you so much! So Amanda sat out in the car with me and Tony for a bit while Brayden was in my lap. I’m thankful I was able to see her, but I’m angry and guilt ridden that I couldn’t go in and visit properly with her on Mother’s Day. She tells me she understands but nothing can take the feeling of guilt away, the feeling that I let my daughter down.
My son, Tyler sent me a text message written in words expressing his love for me better than any card. That has lifted my spirits up. He’s 500 miles away and I so hope to have this house sold and my wheelchair van by the next time he comes.
Steven texted and called me to tell me Happy Mother’s day and how things are going with him since his move, and we just chatted a bit. That was also uplifting.
Tasha and I expressed Happy Mother’s Day to each other last night when she once again left her lights on in her car at work and Tony went to jump her off. She’s just like her Dad with that except Tony usually locks the keys in. How, I don’t know when he needs them to lock from the outside.
So, that was my Mother’s Day. A great day overall, but ALS did have to step in and ruin my time with Amanda. It’s like it sensed things were going well, so it had to put a stop to that. I hate you ALS, but I love and am grateful for all of my understanding family. I know how lucky I am to have their support.
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Until next time, take care,