Let me start with a little backstory… About five or six years ago I was zipping downstairs to the laundry room. I stopped frozen on the last step when I saw a long large snake right in front of the garage door. Like most people, I’m terrified of snakes. I didn’t move for a few minutes and neither did the snake. Finally I started easing back upstairs. Of course this was a rare time I didn’t have my phone on me. I first wanted a picture for proof and to call Tony. When I made it to get my phone and back the snake was gone. Now I was really freaked and had no proof. This must be what people abducted by aliens go through!

As expected Tony downplayed it. I was ready to abandon home and all belongings. Then one day I spotted where a snake had shed it’s skin on a tree branch in the back yard and showed Tony. He bacame a believer. Soon after we spotted him in the front yard. We named him George. We didn’t want to kill him, we just wanted him to go far away. Tony used a long, strong stick to pick him up. He was heavy or at least able to use muscles to push down. He carried him to the wooded area behind our backyard fence. That’s most likely where he came from. He didn’t like it there. We never saw him inside again but several times outside. That summer passed and we never knew what became of george. I wished him well and far away. Case closed.

Now to this morning/afternoon. I awake to a certain tone in Tony’s voice. I immediately ask him what’s wrong. He tells me the garage door is broken. The electric part, it can still be lifted up and down manually, but it’s heavy. OK great, more expense. He first told me he pulled a hanging cord that makes it manual only and he doesn’t know why he did it. Well I know better than that. I know him too well. I kept up with the questioning until he finally fessed up. He pulled the cord to stop electrical movement of garage because he saw on top where a large snake has shed and he wanted to get it before I saw it. When he pulled the cord, some box contraption broke that I don’t get but I believe him. Since I’m so excited about moving down, he didn’t want me worrying about snakes. He loves me so.

The cost isn’t as bad as I thought, but any expense is bad right now. If we buy the part and he fixes it himself, it will be about $30.00. If we have it fixed, it will be about $150.00. He of course wants to fix it but I’m worried he’ll fall off the ladder and break his neck or have some horrible head injury.

This all has put a slight damper on moving to the den. More money, longer til we get down, most importantly I’m worried he’ll get hurt and I’m angry I can’t help him. In days gone by, I would be right there helping him, even though he’s hell to help. Our sons will back me on that I’m sure. He expects you to know what he needs you to do before telling you and gets a little upset when you don’t. He has calmed a bit with that. I actually miss it. I can take his bad attitude. I want to hold the ladder and hand him what he needs and just be there like I used to.

This is a reminder of money and how damn useless I really am with anything physical. I’m trying not to let it upset me but I haven’t been successfull. I miss me!

So I’m going to try and tell myself he has it under control, there will be no ambulance, it will be fixed and we will still be moving down soon. You know what? I don’t even care about a snake. We did learn our snake, George, was not poisonous but, he can still bite. Maybe I care a little. I’m sure I’ll freak if I see one. We’ve lived here over ten years and george has been our only snake ordeal. Maybe it is George.

Why can’t something, anything go smooth for us? We’re really not bad people. I mean shit, it’s like we’ve been cursed. Before anyone asks, We have the lord on our side, we’re saved and going to heaven, thank you for caring.

I’m not joking though we have THE WORST LUCK EVER!  We have tried the whole power of positive thinking and everything. The universe is just not with us. We do have great things to be greatful for and we are. I’m going to stop here with the boring, babbling, angry post. Maybe our life of mishaps and our strong will to stick them out will pay off.

I wish everyone a great day. Seriously, I do. We will be just fine and better for it as usual.

Please visit my website: The ALS Express

Until next time, take care,

April

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